The Cast List. (I capitalized it on purpose, for the record.) I doubt I am not the only one who has a mess of conflicted emotions stirred each time I hear the list mentioned. We talk about them before we audition, after we audition, after we see them. Though many study acting, few study reacting to that list. Bad reactions can cause unnecessary harm and, for the most part, my advice on how to react should come with common sense, yet I learned many of these lessons from my own mistakes. The first reaction I am going to break down is when your dreams come true. Maybe that is getting a lead, maybe that is getting an ensemble role, but I am focusing on receiving your dream-come-true when others will likely be disappointed.
Around a year ago, I stood in front of a wall with high school students littering the ground with lunch trays in wait. I was pretty sure I had been casted, but not positive. I had ran tech at my high school for two years and was the president of the Thespian Troupe- but I sang wrong lyrics at the audition- but I did get a callback- but I was new to this singing thing- but I had a lot of dance experience- but I had only acted in much less competitive productions up to this point- but a lot of people told me I was talented at this acting thing- but four out of every five compliments were from my grandma/grampa/mom/etc.- and this person and that person that auditioned were so good. Ah, the things that raced through my mind every second between callbacks and the cast-list's publishing two-and-a-half weeks later.
Everyone stood suddenly and fell silent as if royalty were passing by. It was not royalty, but a woman holding two sheets of printer paper and scotch tape. It seemed so strange that something all of us, united in anxiety and curiosity, waiting in the hallway during lunch period for was going to be suspended by scotch tape. Mundane scotch tape was going to hold fate and magic to a white brick wall. We squirmed into a clump. I saw my name and didn't move.
This is when my head reverted to running lights for the all-school show of my freshman year, Legally Blonde. The line "Is That My Name Up on that List?" from the song "So Much Better" started playing in my mind on repeat. Every now and then I would get another line from the song(wanting to call my mom, planning to get to the rehearsals early already), but just that one line for the majority of the time. The music in my mind was louder than the people around me, but a few congratulations slipped through and I said thank-you in shock. This was Peter Pan. I had spent nearly sixteen years claiming the flying boy as my fictional boyfriend. It was the musical I watched eight times a day as a four year-old starring Mary Martin (who I was convinced was my preschool teacher at one point in time as they shared the name). It was my dream. Most theatre kids won't have the chance to do their dream show in high school; with so many shows out there, the chance of it happening are low. It was more than that though. My name was next to Peter's.
In moments like these, I believe you must rejoice for your dream coming true- yet there are things to remember. I can recall the memory in slow-motion. Unless you are getting a cast list via email or in a similar way, you are likely not going to receive the news alone. I remember one girl walking away briskly to my right, mumbled complaints, honest congratulations that attempted to hide disappointment, etc. All of this to say, you have to remember the people by your left and your right. You need them. I will talk about being in the different positions as I previously listed in detail in future blogs, but I have been there. I'd been disappointed and confused by sheets of paper held by scotch tape and I knew, this is one of the most important details I am sharing this blog, someone can be genuinely happy for your success whilst feeling the devastation of disappointment. Both emotions can coexist. When you get that dream in your hands and you want to do a victory lap, beware of how/when/with whom you celebrate.
Let's look at a couple of common types of reactions:
- The Psychic - They knew they were going to get the part.
- Eh - They don't care.
- The Party - They are going to celebrate!
- The Reminders - This is really two types of reactions. We have the positive and the negative.
Now, as I have listed these off, you may react in more than one way and each reaction type isn't inherently good or bad. Alright, the Psychic. Maybe you overheard a conversation, they told you at auditions, you are the only one who fits the role remotely, or you have psychic powers, you knew this was coming. You may not have done anything wrong to come to this conclusion, but if you knew you were getting the part keep in mind announcing you already knew may not be the wisest decision.
The Eh is the reaction of barely reacting. Maybe it is shock or maybe it isn't a big deal for you. Though you may be grateful for the role you have received, if you know you aren't reacting much on the exterior, expressing your gratitude intentionally may be a wise choice. You don't have to do this with a lack of genuine response, but be intentional in what messages you are delivering.
The Party is the celebratory response. If you feel the urge to scream in excitement, dance without music, and rip paper into little confetti pieces to toss into the air, I say embrace that urge. It is alright to celebrate- with caution. You are entitled to the feelings you feel in response to the cast list, but so are the people next to you. As happy as your neighbor may be for you, they may be disappointed with what they received. Both feelings are correct. So if you feel the urge to outwardly celebrate, perhaps hold-off until you know that you are not next to individuals who may find that difficult to deal with, especially immediately after the cast-list is posted. I remember after I received the role of Peter Pan I was in much of a state of shock, but eventually my urge to celebrate brewed up in me. While walking back to lunch after the list was posted, I found myself running into an old friend from elementary school who wasn't involved in the show. I told her I just had received great news and needed to celebrate, we hugged and had a very brief celebration of the success. This advice honestly goes beyond responding to a cast list, but receiving any news that stirs an urge to celebrate.
And finally, you have The Reminders. They can either be really positive, or not so much. These responses are to remind people of something they probably already know. So reminding to avoid consists of reminding people, repeatedly, what awesome role you received or reminding them that they didn't get a role. I feel it is unnecessary to explain why this may not be the wisest or most considerate move. Reminding behavior can be super positive if done right and with tact, such as reminding people of previous successes or that there will likely be future shows or other opportunities to get involved that are so important to the show as a whole.
In the end when your dreams have just come true, think about the people beside you and consider how your actions will affect them. Feeling whatever you feel after reading that list is alright, but being intentional in your expression of your feelings can be beneficial for you and your friends. Emphasizing gratitude and illustrating humility can go a long way. Remember, in a sense, you are always auditioning, so put your best foot forward even when you just got the role.
Are there any other common reactions you see from people in this position? If so, comment below. I am excited to see what you have to say. This is just based off of my own experience and I would love to learn from the lives of others.
Finally, I leave you with a sneak-peak at the next installment of this series of reacting to the casting. Your hint is the Honk! song lyric, "It takes all sorts to make a world?"
And scene.